When are we going to stop talking about pre-marital sex as though it’s the worse sin ever?
Most of us have engaged in pre-marital sex, most of us are the products of pre-marital sex and so are our children. Yet, we live in a society where young people are always counselled about pre-marital sex by persons who would never say, “I have engaged in pre-marital sex and that is why I am qualified to let you know, you will not be missing out on anything, believe you me, you could wait”.
Are we so caught up in living lives that are ‘pure’ that we over look being honest. Perhaps the message will be louder, clearer, more believable if it comes from a source that is credible. What are we so ashamed of; that we have sinned, who hasn’t?
It is about time we stop putting sins on various levels of severity, and start being honest with each other, and with the ones we are trying to help. The self-righteous stance we often take when talking to young people about sex is not really helping them much.
People react differently to someone who speaks with experience. The fight against Aids for instance has not been won but now that there are persons infected who are brave enough to speak about it, some good results are being produced even if it is only one person who becomes more understanding or avoids risky sex .
We owe it to children to be honest about sex.
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You know I said to someone that I'm not going to preach to my daughter to preserve her virginity til marriage. As a matter of fact, marriage will not even be an ultimate goal. Instead I'll tell her to wait and only engage in sex when she believes she is mentally and emotionally prepared for it. Also I don't agree with the concept of holding on to a man against all odds. If for whatever reason she's unhappy, I'll advise her to move on. Our parents are true martyrs, but unfortunately I don't agree with the martyrdom concept! It leads to bitterness and unhappiness. I know some will view me as radical, and they may be right. I'm not encouraging promiscuity mind you, but the freedom to be in control of her sexuality as opposed to being a slave to it...
I think you make a very good point, a woman should be in contrl of every ounce of her being.