Agree to disagree
We don’t all look alike even identical twins are not mirror reflections of each other. We are born into different economic conditions, have different colour eyes, different goals in life, different life philosophies…
It should not amaze us then that we don’t always see eye to eye.
Yet it does. I am convinced that sometimes our differences astound us to the point where we forget ourselves.
As one person explained to me this week we can “disagree without being disagreeable”. Few things are as interesting as an intellectual debate, a debate free (of another term I was reminded of) ad hominem. Ad hominem is a Latin term that literally translates as “to the man”. So, it can refer to arguments in which people forget about the facts, the real issues and attack each other.
To me it is a sign of weakness.
It often creeps in when one person thinks “You are certainly not my equal but your reasoning is far better than mine”. This is the crucial point in the argument, some of us might decide to say; “Ok you are right I see your point”, but some of us will take another path, and so the name calling begins. If our intention was to as the Chinese put it “safe face” there is nothing more ridiculous than to look at arguments/debates digress/deteriorate because one party decides to take it “to the man”. This is the point where words and phrases like; “idiot”, “nonsense”, “foolish thought”, “waste of time” …come in.
You see I can disagree with you and your position on anything but there is never a reason for me to disrespect you in an argument.
Let’s always agree to disagree, and disagree without being disagreeable.
Adriana S. King
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